A Darkened Window

She said, "You don't like this song do ya?" I said, "It's okay, I guess."  Slowly I sat down in the wicker chair by the false Aurelius and stared up at the weird cathedral like window above the slider. The slider was a squeaky thing, the track must have some dirt in it, that led out to the deck. In every part of my being I just wanted to open that slider and walk out onto the deck.  And then into the back yard.  And then in the park abutting the back yard.  If I had any real integrity I would say good-bye for real and for good and I would start walking and not look back.