Lincoln’s Birthday

02/12/19

Today used to be one of two national holidays in the month of February.  Lincoln and Washington, we celebrated them with two separate days off from school.  I kind of miss that.  I know a trade off was made and we got another Monday off in another month but still it was tradition.

53 years ago, this date I broke my arm on Patsy’s Hill in Pedricktown, NJ. A fractured pair of bones in my left forearm changed my life. 

The injury left me with scars deeper the half inch larger left wrist which is now part of my body. Sledding into that tree led to obesity. Obesity led to a tortured spate of years which created an all-consuming sense of self-doubt inside of me. Tsk tsk, and oh well, the snowball of negativity that event caused for me was so long ago and who gives a flaming fuck.

Thing is from that day on I have been insecure about my looks, my value, my ability to be loved.  Thing is from that day no matter how much I grow and evolve, I am still ten years old inside and broken.  Events unanticipated, yeah they change us.