Friday, April 18, 2014

My Beautiful Reward



It is Good Friday.

Today is one of the two days that together with Easter are the nexus of the Christian church calendar and belief structure. On a day somewhere in history according to church doctrine a being both man and God was killed in a barbaric manner. The death was a real death according to the precepts of faith of an individual pure in heart, spirit, and soul, well pure in everyway. The act of this death of described as that of a “lamb willingly led to the slaughter” purports to have borne away the burden of all our sins, our failings, our misdeeds and those things we wish would never be examined in the light. We, as I look about this world, need to have our sins borne away. Our hands and hearts are stained with dark dark things.

In my little town I was raised a Baptist. At age 13 or so I was washed in the sanctified and holy waters by an act of full immersion by Rev. Martin. I professed the articles of faith of this sect. On a number of occasions as the years rolled on I responded to altar calls because there was a deep shade and obscurity of truth I felt within me, call these acts pleas for balm for a troubled soul. On those nights when Billy Graham preached on TV I watched voluntarily as he talked about the clash between sin and goodness and the need for spiritual cleansing. Somehow those words spoke in a stentorian tone touched me.

But it didn’t stop me. In those dark and little rooms beneath the sanctuary of that country church I do believe I may have copped a feel or two during youth group activities. And as I have said before I hope God has forgiven me for blowing that doobie with my cousin in the bathroom beneath the sanctuary. Oh how we inhaled deeply during the start of the Sunday school weekly assembly. I will forever remember the pot smoke that was streaked with the light from the stained glass windows as we got upstairs for the end of the assembly. I will also remember the distinct feeling 150 eyes were staring at me. You would have thought they would have vented that room to the outside of the building.

But I digress. I do believe there is good. I do believe there is evil. I do believe good must be brought to the point of supremacy over evil. Are the teachings of the Christian church completely correct on all points? Can we simply listen to a preacher and find our way to God? Well, no. How could a person who is as fallible a mortal as we are, lead us into holiness? We humans err in all our efforts of trying to define and refine the meaning of the divine. But we must try the darkness cannot be allowed to prevail. As Paul said in Philippians 2:12 we can’t give up for we must“…continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling,”

I do believe we as a species need absolution. I do believe there is a transcendent beauty in the depiction of the Easter resurrection and the promise of absolution it offers. If you find your way to holiness through this path, that is wonderful. If your route is different I do not judge you or condemn you. My only hope is that you seek holiness, that you seek redemption, and that you seek the truth. I am still looking and I doubt I will ever stop.