Thursday, July 31, 2008
In what I believe will ultimately be a vain attempt to appease my failing gallbladder I have been aggressively cutting extra fat from my diet. The calculation is simple, higher fat = more pain. As a result of this shift I have been eating more “direct” foods. I have been consuming a large number of fruits, veggies and grains. While this has resulted in more trips to farmers markets and the like the results have surprised me.
Night before last I made an omelet. Using Pam® or something akin to it (it was in a blue spray can) as the pan lubricant I whipped two eggs together and commenced to cook that yellow shell. Then I added as the center contents 3 or 4 spears of freshly blanced asparagus and one diced fresh organic tomato. I did cheat and add just about 1 ½ teaspoons of shredded (by hand) parmesan cheese. Wow. The texture of real vegetables was something I had almost forgotten. The taste of that fresh from a roadside stand tomato was just awesome. Sensuous food, what a concept that is. Next time there will be mushrooms, flavorful mushrooms.
Clearly I am not a food writer. Clearly this is not commentary on Kant or Nietzsche. But sometimes the rediscovery of something simple is enough to make a day worth living. And I forgot shallots, next time there will be a hint of shallot too.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Eternity in the Palm of my Hand
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
There is greater comfort in the substance of silence then in the answer to a question. Eternity is in the present. Eternity is in the palm of the hand. Eternity is a seed of fire whose sudden roots break barriers that keep my heart from being an abyss.
Thomas Merton, July 4, 1952, II 487
Walking to work this morning from the coffee shop, about a 5-7 stroll, I realized that a morning like this is my favorite kind of morning. It is warm. Clouds are hanging low but there is a promise of clearing in the western sky. The air is humid but not clammy; it still has the cleansed feeling of a recent rain. On morning like this I feel the promise of growth, the promise of a better series of experiences. Not too warm and not cool at all it is the start for what could be a perfect day.
My thought is that mornings like this seem promising because it was on mornings like this my life was better in my youth. A rainy day in school meant no outdoor recess and me the myopic kid would not get my ass kicked for my inability to play ball games in gym class. Corollary to that I would get more time to spend with my beloved books, science fiction tales where the hero was not the alpha male but rather just a clever person with odd bookish traits. I don’t deny these books were lacking in the formalities of great writing. Also there was sexism in these tomes but often the male hero had an equally capable female foil. Rainy days, coke bottle glasses and books about bookish heroes; life was simpler then.
Whatever the genesis my walk in today was six minutes of blissful peace. It was profound silence; it was eternity in the palm of my hand.
There is greater comfort in the substance of silence then in the answer to a question. Eternity is in the present. Eternity is in the palm of the hand. Eternity is a seed of fire whose sudden roots break barriers that keep my heart from being an abyss.
Thomas Merton, July 4, 1952, II 487
Walking to work this morning from the coffee shop, about a 5-7 stroll, I realized that a morning like this is my favorite kind of morning. It is warm. Clouds are hanging low but there is a promise of clearing in the western sky. The air is humid but not clammy; it still has the cleansed feeling of a recent rain. On morning like this I feel the promise of growth, the promise of a better series of experiences. Not too warm and not cool at all it is the start for what could be a perfect day.
My thought is that mornings like this seem promising because it was on mornings like this my life was better in my youth. A rainy day in school meant no outdoor recess and me the myopic kid would not get my ass kicked for my inability to play ball games in gym class. Corollary to that I would get more time to spend with my beloved books, science fiction tales where the hero was not the alpha male but rather just a clever person with odd bookish traits. I don’t deny these books were lacking in the formalities of great writing. Also there was sexism in these tomes but often the male hero had an equally capable female foil. Rainy days, coke bottle glasses and books about bookish heroes; life was simpler then.
Whatever the genesis my walk in today was six minutes of blissful peace. It was profound silence; it was eternity in the palm of my hand.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
I Knew It Wasn't Over
Oh Hell's bells now my beloved wife is incapacitated with a kidney stone. Yowch!!!! I know it hurts and I am doing what I can to aid her, although I think the Vicodin is doing a better job than me. Still after my prior recitation of why I had not been posting I thought that I might be coming to the end of this spate of karmic retribution. It ain't over yet.
Friday, July 25, 2008
A Moment for Understanding
I liked this. It kind of sums my feeling today. However it does of course require that I quit my job and become an itinerant wandering around like Cane in Kung Fu.
“The great obligation of a Christian is to prove himself to be one by hating no person that is by condemning no being, by rejecting no soul. It is a sign of weakness in our commitment to a holy life that so many who claim to be faithful are so impatient with others and they fume at them and verbally damn them. They without hesitation dismiss whole classes, races and nations. Again, hate no one, condemn no one, and reject no one if you mean to live in the sacred.”
“The great obligation of a Christian is to prove himself to be one by hating no person that is by condemning no being, by rejecting no soul. It is a sign of weakness in our commitment to a holy life that so many who claim to be faithful are so impatient with others and they fume at them and verbally damn them. They without hesitation dismiss whole classes, races and nations. Again, hate no one, condemn no one, and reject no one if you mean to live in the sacred.”
Thursday, July 24, 2008
MY PLAN FOR WORLD DOMINATION IN SIX EASY STEPS
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Dear readers, all four of you I apologize. To the four of you (trust me I know because I get e-mailed reports from a statistics service about the number of hits my page gets) I bow my head in shame. My lack of diligence in posting is very apparent. My guilt for not staying current weighs heavily on what little remains of my mind. I will try and be more diligent.
It may be the very nature of the whole blog thing. Deadlines and me have just never seen eye to eye. Mostly it is because my life is always awhirl with kids and spouse and work and the other 10 plates that are spinning in the air (remember those novelty acts on the Ed Sullivan show). While I try to keep the blog fresh my efforts are at best inept.
Catchy title in the subject line, eh? The NSA has already called. The rubric however really has nothing to do with the content of this post. I just thought it would be a good attention grabber.
The last twenty days have been frenetic and frantic. There was a flood in our home’s basement over the 4th of July. Still can't pinpoint the cause. Repairs, well actually sucking the water out and drying the drywall cost $2,500. Youch.
Then,
Came the transport of Child #1 to camp about 1.5 hours away. A music camp. No real contact with him for 10 days. He has been diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. It appears to be quite mild but still it means challenges. Time at camp thus left my wife constantly worried. The whole social interaction thing can go so wrong so quickly with a kid with this disorder. Great intellectual focus but interactions with others are a challenge. Hmmmh. Wonder if he got that from me.
Came the insurance claim for the flood. How do you quantify all that stuff we have collected over the years in dollar terms. Some things are easy, like the Wii. Some are not like the video of various family events.
Came taking Child #2 to camp 4 hours from home. Of course we showed up two weeks early due to a scheduling faux pas on my part. Child #2 was notably upset. However after begging (how many times can I beg and say I am sorry) they worked him in.
Came the work projects of my wife, drafting a proposal to some NGOs I think for the government of and island chain in the Pacific to get special status as a preserve. This meant she was up to 1 a.m. for the week our kid was away typing. When Mom is not happy, nobody is happy.
Came the doctor’s report that my gallbladder will have to go. I am going to try and hold off on that a bit. Still, every day it hurts a little.
Came the summer cold and total inertia for five days (Francie has it now, go figure).
Came the letters home from child #2. I quote them in their entirety, "Camp sucks, at least send cookies" and the second letter "Camp still sucks, the Dunes suck, I barfed, send more cookies". The pictures at the website of the camp belie this recitation for in each he is foisting a peace sign or a thumbs up and is smiling.
Came the trip to IKEA and getting two living room chairs(flood replacements), a loft, a table and several picture frames into a Prius. Riding strapped to the side of the vehicle on the ride home I got a new appreciation for what it means to be an auto grille. I am still getting that glowing lightning bug goo out of my teeth.
Came the one day and two evenings of assembly of the aforementioned stuff-insert tab A into Slot B and use Allen wrench to snug. Ugh, I am still tired from that task.
Came the trip to Camp 1 (Blue Lake Music and Fine Arts Camp) to pick up child #1. Despite all the rest of the above this was really good. The boy made acquaintances. He simply hasn't done that before. He said hi to people. He liked the camp and his camp report card with the exception of the note that "he eats like a barbarian" was good. Oh and there was his orchestral take with the other campers on Stairway to Heaven. It rocked.
On Saturday we pick up child two. We will see what that report card is like.
Okay, I am not totally depressed or completely overwhelmed but I am close. I promise I will try and post something cheery tomorrow, or maybe the next day, or perhaps the day after that.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
The Water of Life
"My life is like a stroll on the beach...as near to the edge as I can go."
--Thoreau
In all my life there has never been anything that gave me peace and calm like wading into the water at Ocean City, NJ on a calm warm summer evening as the sun was going down. It was as if I was one with all of existence. There are only a few times you ever get to feel that sensation. Sexual climax doesn't do it, job promotions don't do it, romantic emotional couplings don't do it.... Only the water, the sky and the fading light have ever brought me peace. At the water's edge I will lay me down and await the coming of the indigo evening.
--Thoreau
In all my life there has never been anything that gave me peace and calm like wading into the water at Ocean City, NJ on a calm warm summer evening as the sun was going down. It was as if I was one with all of existence. There are only a few times you ever get to feel that sensation. Sexual climax doesn't do it, job promotions don't do it, romantic emotional couplings don't do it.... Only the water, the sky and the fading light have ever brought me peace. At the water's edge I will lay me down and await the coming of the indigo evening.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Hey Baby It's the Fourth of July
On of the most under rated bands of the American Punk movement was X, the quintessential lost souls of the new West. Perhaps the reason for this lack of prominence is that while that put together great individual songs their albums (with the exception Much More Fun In the New World (or whatever it is really called) were hit and miss affairs. For me their defining X moment other than singing “Devil Doll” on Dick Clark’s Rocking New Year’s Eve was a cover of the Blasters/Dave Alvin tune “4th of July”. It is a heartbreaking affair. Every year around this time I pull it out and listen to it. It stills just hits me hard, just like the first time I heard it. Here are the lyrics. Go find the song on the web and give it a listen.
She's waitin' for me
when I get home from work
oh, but things ain't just the same
She turns out the light
and cries in the dark
won't answer when I call her name
On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
She gives me her cheek
when I want her lips
but I don't have the strength to go
On the lost side of town
in a dark apartment
we gave up trying so long ago
On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
What ever happened I
apologize
so dry your tears and baby
walk outside, it's the Fourth of July
On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, Baby take a walk outside
She's waitin' for me
when I get home from work
oh, but things ain't just the same
She turns out the light
and cries in the dark
won't answer when I call her name
On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
She gives me her cheek
when I want her lips
but I don't have the strength to go
On the lost side of town
in a dark apartment
we gave up trying so long ago
On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
What ever happened I
apologize
so dry your tears and baby
walk outside, it's the Fourth of July
On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, Baby take a walk outside
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)